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drunkoffthestars) wrote2005-11-09 12:06 am
drunkoffthestars) wrote2005-11-09 12:06 am
Entry tags:
meta, with a side of fanishness
I've just been reading this post about fandom and male privilege that has been making the rounds and it just brought up this whole host of things.
The thing that interested me was the fact that the men seemed to see it as such a problem that they felt uncomfortable in a space dominated by women and their interests, but didn't make the connection to the fact that maybe, just maybe, that is how women feel in a culture dominated by men and male interests.
The other thing that really interested me in the comments was the persistence of those who were disagreeing/debating/whatever seemed to think that fandom was all about men. Because hello? NOT ABOUT MEN. Granted, slashers talk about them a lot, but that's not what this corner of fandom is about.
Fandom is about just that: BEING A FAN OF SOMETHING. It's about your TV show, it's about your boyband, it's about your book, it's about your movie, your favorite actor, whatever. That's what it's about.
On a slightly secondary level, it's about being a validated fan. It's about what you as a (generally female) fan find interesting about the object of your fanishness. It's about what other fans find interesting. It's about being validated by other fans who share similar interests and interpretations of the source material. It's about sharing the squee. It's about being able to talk about those interestes in a less censored way, to to talk about things that are normally not mentioned in polite society.
But in no way, shape, or form is it about men. Sure, we talk about them, and bitch about them, and think about how hot they are, and how if one is hot, then two are hotter. But it's not actually about men.
And you know, I have a hard time believing that is any discomfort felt on the part of men venturing into the female-dominated end of the pool is a bad thing. You are always going to be uncomfortable where you don't fit in, in a place where those who make up the majority are not like you. And maybe, if you get off your ass and THINK about what is making you uncomfortable and WHY it is making you uncomfortable, you could start to empathize with those around you and grow up a little into a slightly better, more empathetic, more understanding, person than you were before.
***
But enough about that. What I really wanted to say was how much the most recent episode of Grey's Anatomy totally redeemed the Whole Entire Show for me. I was really getting to the end of my rope on the whole Meridith drama. She was just getting whiny and everything was revolving around her whine and I was loosing any and all sympathy I had for her in the first place. But this? Totally redeemed it. Because this was the fallout. This was her dealing with her consequences, and almost gracefully, at that.
Aside: McDreamy? A total AssHat. No sympathy, just lust. Because he is WAY hotter than he has any right to be. But sympathy? OMG NO. Because he fucking PURSUED HER. He went out of his way to go after her, even when she said no. And he knew he was married. But he went after her anyway. And then dumped her on her ass. So, total asshat with no sympathy for him. But he is still way hot.
I also like George. A lot. He is cute and rambly and has really good intentions and is Burke's guy or whatever. So. Cute. and he's competent. Cute! Also, seems really squishable. And I like that.
And the thing where Alex totally pulled his ass out of his head and kissed Izzy? Was hot.
the end. omgsotired.
The thing that interested me was the fact that the men seemed to see it as such a problem that they felt uncomfortable in a space dominated by women and their interests, but didn't make the connection to the fact that maybe, just maybe, that is how women feel in a culture dominated by men and male interests.
The other thing that really interested me in the comments was the persistence of those who were disagreeing/debating/whatever seemed to think that fandom was all about men. Because hello? NOT ABOUT MEN. Granted, slashers talk about them a lot, but that's not what this corner of fandom is about.
Fandom is about just that: BEING A FAN OF SOMETHING. It's about your TV show, it's about your boyband, it's about your book, it's about your movie, your favorite actor, whatever. That's what it's about.
On a slightly secondary level, it's about being a validated fan. It's about what you as a (generally female) fan find interesting about the object of your fanishness. It's about what other fans find interesting. It's about being validated by other fans who share similar interests and interpretations of the source material. It's about sharing the squee. It's about being able to talk about those interestes in a less censored way, to to talk about things that are normally not mentioned in polite society.
But in no way, shape, or form is it about men. Sure, we talk about them, and bitch about them, and think about how hot they are, and how if one is hot, then two are hotter. But it's not actually about men.
And you know, I have a hard time believing that is any discomfort felt on the part of men venturing into the female-dominated end of the pool is a bad thing. You are always going to be uncomfortable where you don't fit in, in a place where those who make up the majority are not like you. And maybe, if you get off your ass and THINK about what is making you uncomfortable and WHY it is making you uncomfortable, you could start to empathize with those around you and grow up a little into a slightly better, more empathetic, more understanding, person than you were before.
***
But enough about that. What I really wanted to say was how much the most recent episode of Grey's Anatomy totally redeemed the Whole Entire Show for me. I was really getting to the end of my rope on the whole Meridith drama. She was just getting whiny and everything was revolving around her whine and I was loosing any and all sympathy I had for her in the first place. But this? Totally redeemed it. Because this was the fallout. This was her dealing with her consequences, and almost gracefully, at that.
Aside: McDreamy? A total AssHat. No sympathy, just lust. Because he is WAY hotter than he has any right to be. But sympathy? OMG NO. Because he fucking PURSUED HER. He went out of his way to go after her, even when she said no. And he knew he was married. But he went after her anyway. And then dumped her on her ass. So, total asshat with no sympathy for him. But he is still way hot.
I also like George. A lot. He is cute and rambly and has really good intentions and is Burke's guy or whatever. So. Cute. and he's competent. Cute! Also, seems really squishable. And I like that.
And the thing where Alex totally pulled his ass out of his head and kissed Izzy? Was hot.
the end. omgsotired.