I am wearing my "kind of an asshole" hat, isn't it pretty?

[drunkoffthestars]

BANDFLESH - I DON'T GET WHAT THE FUSS IS.

at first, I didn't get what the community was doing, then I thought it was boring, and now I kinda get why it would be entertaining (though I myself do not have a million hours to go capslock about peebabies and Teh Peen). I still haven't seen a link to the OMGRACISM (that I think started the whole to-do), and I have yet to find the bits where they SAY MEAN THINGS, so I remain utterly in the dark about why exactly there so much anti-bandflesh sentiment. Um? Yeah, I guess maybe I'd feel a little different if I was told that people were SAYING MEAN THINGS about me there, but... I dunno. I sort of feel like it is the *internet*. That's were people go to say mean things! And besides, the actual comm itself seems fairly harmless to me?

I guess I just see a difference between the way anonymity is used there and the way it is used in a lot of other situations. It is set up to be more than just some place where you can mouth off and talk smack. IDK.

You guys who hate that comm can totes defriend me over this, I guess. I'll just cry into my pillow at night. 'S cool.

But really. The actual reason I care at all about this wank is the part where one of the awesome-er (I can only say that b/c SO MANY HAVE YET TO BE POSTED) Big Bang stories got deleted when someone deleted her journal due to said wank. BUT! I did find out that my beloved Google has cached it, so I can keep it forever! \o/ I'll have to see if I can track down an email for the author, b/c I really really liked it.

Comments

[stele3.insanejournal.com (from livejournal.com)]

The author in question discovered that a personal friend (or more than one?) of hers had been badmouthing her on that community. I don't know if she will be back for a while, but I know she was hurt by the whole thing and I imagine she's laying low.

The racist comment in question was deleted, which caused something of a to-do in the community, since they don't believe in deleting comments. I honestly know very little beyond that.

I do agree that the community is set up to be much more than a smack-talking place. I have, however, seen it used as such several times (another one of my friends was emailed a link, presumably by someone in the community, to an anonmeme dogpiling her). People, myself included, feel paranoid about their flists and who might be talking smack about them, since that's also happened a couple of times. Which is a damn shame, because there are perfectly lovely people in bandflesh; however, by definition, I can't tell the good from the bad. So it's one big mess.

[clare-san.livejournal.com]

It sucks when shitty people are shitty friends. I guess one of the reasons that it is hard for me to wrap my head around why people don't like it is that I've never ever ever had something like that happen to me, so I keep getting DOES NOT COMPUTE when I think about that kind of shit.

Well, I keep trying to write these epic comments explaining how I conceptualize friendship and relationships and internet interaction, which I'm pretty sure are tl;dr. Suffice it to say, I believe you don't talk smack about your friends (especially not anywhere they could see it), and when it comes down to it, if I'm getting smack-talked and Friend says they weren't doing it, I believe them. ;_; I feel so naive and shit when it comes to this. On the other hand, I've never really trusted anyone I met over the internet with anything OMGHUGE either.

I guess I don't really expect everyone to like each other, and the only parts of that comm that I've seen seem to fall into that category rather than the hate-mongering. But I can see where it would make people nervous.

[kalpurna.livejournal.com]

I have, however, seen it used as such several times (another one of my friends was emailed a link, presumably by someone in the community, to an anonmeme dogpiling her).

Just to clarify: I can virtually guarantee that was no one who considers themselves a member of the community. We've had an unknown angry linker lurking the comm for a few months and trying to stir shit by linking people to threads about them, and we find it deeply infuriating.

[stele3.insanejournal.com (from livejournal.com)]

I... I honestly have my doubts in that regard. There was some grudgewank going on at the time between her and someone in the comm. But I suppose it's a moot point, since it can't be proven conclusively either way, and I don't know the intimate details further than that. And you know your community better than I do.